4 Years Later...

I woke up this morning, looked out the window, and saw gray skies. I rolled over and gently touched the shoulder of the man that, 4 years ago today, I made a vow in front of God, friends, and family to commit to for the rest of my earthly life.

And that morning I woke up and saw gray skies too.

I don't remember a ton about the morning before our wedding ceremony except the pressure surrounding me to make a decision: in or out. Where would the ceremony be held? The skies were gray, mist was already falling. I needed to make a call so that the staff would know where to set up the chairs.

I'd love to tell you that I was a calm, cool bride when asked to make this decision. CLEARLY I knew the right answer since we chose our venue partially because it had a spectacular back-up location in the event of rain. CLEARLY when I started to think of my grandmother who would be in a wheelchair and my father who has balance issues and my mother-in-law who had recently had life-saving abdominal surgery and was still shaky on her feet I knew the right answer. CLEARLY I told them, without batting an eye to bring the whole thing inside.

Clearly.

Or not. What really happened was I panicked. Steve wasn't there with me to make the decision. I was convinced he'd be upset about bringing it in. I begged someone to let me talk to him on the phone, and all of my bridesmaids AND both mothers stood around trying to convince me that Steve would stand by my decision - I'm the bride, I'm the one there, I needed to make a call. I begged someone to let me get to a computer where I could see a radar. My mom brought me outside and showed me the mist. 9:45 - decision time - clicked closer. Finally my mom saw I needed reassurance - and SHE called Steve for me.

WE decided to bring it in... my mom as conduit, WE decided to bring it in. Was I still nervous about whether or not Steve would be upset we were inside? Sure. Was it ridiculous and as soon as I turned the corner with my stepdad holding my arm did I feel better because I saw Steve's face smiling at me with the biggest smile I'd ever seen? Absolutely.

Rain can't stop a beautiful day from happening...

See... the thing is, Steve's not just that guy I married. He's my best friend. He's my partner in crime, literally my other half. We don't make any decision without each other... well... any life-affecting decision. Any job decision. Plans. Etc. I can make it through the grocery store just fine on my own, I'm talking about the big stuff. When we have to travel for work, sometimes we feel lost for a few days while the other is gone. None of this is in an unhealthy way - we definitely manage without the other if we need to without freaking out - but rather, it's what I believe God's design for marriage was meant to be. Two become one.

We work through the hard times together with support and grace and we celebrate the happy times with smiles and laughter. Together.

It's amazing to me how intertwined two people's lives can be. Not a day goes by that I don't feel that our marriage is getting stronger, that God is growing us in ways we haven't been able and won't be able to imagine. As we look to the future, I can't wait to be old and gray alongside of Steve.

So it's fitting that it's raining on our anniversary. It's a gentle reminder that we are here for each other to weather the storms, hold each other tight, celebrate the beauty in our life, and cherish the love and deep friendship we share. To quote the song my mom sang during our reception: "Let it rain - the sun shines in my soul...".

I love you, Steve. Happy Anniversary. God certainly blessed the road that brought us together.